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I FEEL THE WARP OVERTAKING ME, IT IS A GOOD PAIN

I WAS WRITING A WELL THOUGHT OUT BLOG ENTRY ABOUT THE FACT THAT UNLIKE NORMAL PEOPLE WHO USE DRIVE TO FUEL THEIR AMBITIONS AND ACCOMPLISH STUFF, I DON’T.

I USE FURY. A COLLECTION OF FRUSTRATIONS, ANGER AND GENERAL RAGE TO ACCOMPLISH GREAT THINGS IN MY LIFE. IT SOUNDS STUPID BUT ITS SOMETHING THAT’S ALREADY TOO INTERTWINED IN MY BODY TO CHANGE AT THIS POINT.

BUT THERE WAS A SPLIT SECOND BLACKOUT THAT FORCED MY PC TO CRASH AND I CAN’T RECOVER THE TWO THOUSAND WORD ENTRY SO IM JUST GOING TO DO IT AS SHORT AS POSSIBLE.


THIS IS FURY. IT IS THE NECTAR IN WHICH I FEED ON. I ALREADY MENTIONED HOW I GOT IT, READ UP ^

MOST PEOPLE THINK IM ALOOF AND JUST TELL PEOPLE TO KEEP CALM AND CHILL OUT TO RELAX. BUT WHAT THEY DON’T KNOW IS THAT I KEEP ALL THAT STUPID SHIT THAT IS FRUSTRATING AND ANNOYING AND GENERALLY FUCKING RETARDED AND USE IT TO FUEL MY RAGE. I THEN USE THAT RAGE. BUT INSTEAD OF PUNCHING PEOPLE OR KILLING THEM OR HURTING THEM I USE IT TO DO CREATIVE STUFF WHICH IS ALSO PRODUCTIVE.

Yes I use anger to become productive. It sounds stupid yeah? Deal with it.

BUT FOR SOME REASON I LOST THAT DRIVE LATELY AND WAS JUST CATHARTIC. IT WAS FUCKING RETARDEDLY FRUSTRATING HOW JUST NOT CARING ABOUT ANYTHING I WAS. WHICH WOULD HAVE BEEN GREAT FUEL FOR MY RAGE IF I WAS ABLE TO USE IT IN THE FIRST PLACE.

IT WAS BECAUSE OF SOME STUPID SHIT WITH SOMEONE.

BUT SOMETHING HAPPENED AND SOMEONE THANKFULLY SPARKED THE RAGE BACK INSIDE ME AND NOW I AM ANGRY AS FUCK.

I FELT SO COLD THEN. BUT NOW THAT IT’S BACK, IT FEELS PLEASANTLY WARM HAVING THIS RAGING TORRENT INSIDE ME, SEETHING AND BEGGING TO BE UTILIZED.

I’M HOPING THAT THIS ANGER KEEPS ON RAGING INSIDE ME AS IT DID ALL THOSE YEARS AGO AND NEVER STOPS. I WANT TO USE IT TO ACCOMPLISH THINGS.

SO THANK YOU TO YOU WHO SOMEHOW MANAGED TO SPARK THIS ANGER BACK IN ME. YOU PROBABLY DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU DID AND I DONT KNOW HOW, (actually I probably do know but dont want to talk about it) BUT EITHER WAY THANK YOU.

ALSO YOU ARE A CUNT, JUST SAYING.

Goddamn that entry was really long, sure but It was well thought out and I was pouring out my feelings. I guess it was boring anyway. So here’s something shorter.

Thanks for reading.

Flashback: Nope. There is no title.

So basically the internet is fucked today, due to the storms and all. I can’t play my online games. Decided to remake my resume, but I couldn’t remember the details. Went to my email and searched RESUME and this thing popped up.

It was one of the things I wrote back in… 2009, when I still actually actively wrote stuff.I haven’t read it yet because I’m going to post it for everyone to see before I get some sense inside me. It’ll be fun to see how fucked up I was before!

I think it’s an introductory piece or something idk. Here, I took a screenshot of the title of the email. 

ENJOY

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Temple Prime is Dead. Long live Temple Prime.

I’ve been putting off making this entry for a few days now. Partly because I was busy (am, still) and partly because I wanted to make it right. But I realized that well, nobody reads my blog anyway so I’m just gonna dump it.

So Temple Prime is the name of the PC that I saved up and built with my own paycheck. It was a dream of mine to achieve that by 27 and I did it when I was 20 years old. Seven whole years early. 

It was a point of personal pride to me. A symbol of what I could potentially achieve if I put my mind into it. Or at the very least, that I could achieve my dreams. It was a major motivational icon for me.

So I was pretty devastated when it finally gave up one week before my birthday.

To be honest, this wasn’t the first time it broke down, but those times I could remedy it one way or another without significant expenses. But time does go on and old things die. Which is what happened.

Losing my games is not really a big deal, because of CLOUD SAVES and ONLINE GAMING. But I was mostly concerned over our family’s history, which is only centrally stored in my PC (i know right?)

Luckily, my friend Jesse, that based mofo, sent me his spare parts because he wasn’t going to use them. They were a significant upgrade to what I use, but I would still need a new PSU and 4gigs of RAM to actually revive Temple Prime.

I tried figuring out how long before I could muster the funds to revive Temple Prime, and it was going to take too long. Not only will I be without a PC, but earlier I also agreed to cast/host/stream an online Starcraft 2 tournament
(to be announced later) and without a PC I would not be able to do it. So naturally I was stressing pretty hard at this and ended up a bit depressed.

But, it looked like someone up there really likes me, or that I finally run out of bad luck to expend, as just after my birthday, my uncle came over for some business with my mother. He asked me what was wrong with my PC and told me that he knew a guy and that he could help me out.

He was an electronics guy. So yeah, suddenly there was hope.

He came back the following week. We go to his place in Cavite,

He then brings me to this junk shop looking place. Think of an old electronics repair shop in front of a house. Broken TVs, VCRs. Electric Fans and other stuff strewn around in various stages of repair or decay. In the middle was a middle-aged man.

My uncle introduces me to the guy, Bene he called him.  He was the kindest guy ever, asked me what was the problem with my PC then said it’s no problem at all.

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That’s him in yellow. And that’s Temple Prime being operated on by my uncle.

Now I wasn’t saying he was the kindest because of the fact that he’s fixing my pride and joy. No, obviously fixing and installing takes time, and in that time we were talking about life and the other stuff in it. But as this is my blog, I won’t get into details. Basically he’s a good man just trying to live his life to the fullest.

Anyway, my uncle gives me his unused 4g RAM and Tito Bene gives me a 600W PSU. Great, I can use my PC again! In exchange, I give the parts that I don’t need anymore so they can complete another PC and maybe use or sell them.

Those parts had sentimental value for me, I have to admit giving them away wasn’t easy. But I figured if Jesse can do it then why can’t I?

I convinced my uncle to take me home instead of staying over the night. I didn’t think about it until I remembered he owned a motorbike and not a car. An hour of practicing my grip so my System Tower doesn’t fall in the highway to a million pieces, we finally got home.

Unfortunately the crash was so sudden that I was not able to backup whatever was on my primary partition. So everything there is lost. But the important files are always safe, so I’m good after a night of reinstalling.

With that Temple Prime is back up online, and so is my dream and hopes for my potential. 

Did I mention that this all happened during my Uncle’s birthday?

Belated Happy Birthday Tito Noel. And Thank you so much!

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